top of page


"The Grief Letter" began as a personal letter from an associate pastor of a Tallahassee, Florida, flagship church, offering comfort and encouragement to individuals and families mourning the death of a loved one. Grieving recipients began calling it “the grief letter.”


Now “the grief letter” has become a full-length book, titled: “The Grief Letter”


In 1993 on the staff of a flagship church in Florida’s capital city, Fran Buhler started sending an annual letter to members with a death in their family during that year. Recipients began calling it “the grief letter”. In the 21 years Buhler served as Associate Pastor and Director of Ministry, he received more comments and notes of appreciation for “the grief letter” than any single thing he has done in ministry --- except a short sermon! Now “the grief letter” has become a full-length book, titled: “The Grief Letter”.

TGL is a thoughtful grief gift for hurting hearts, an encouraging word for sorrow-torn spirits, a field guide for the journey of grief and a practical tool box for helping others in their grief and sorrow --- including grief professionals in their role as pastors, seminary professors, social workers, long term care providers and Hospice personnel.


TGL will help you and your loved ones deal with the sharp pain and deep sorrow of your grief.

Reading TGL is like being with an understanding friend, who listens, offering a non-judgmental ear plus gentle guidance and faith support.

TGL will help you along the dark and winding often confusing hallways of grief for as long as you may need help. Keep it close, read, pray. Allow TGL to help you with your grieving --- and maybe even your believing!

As you move gradually through your grief, moving forward in your life again, TGL will help you grow toward the time when you will be able to help someone in their grief. 


“The Grief Letter” Author Knows Grief: Fran Buhler has been there.

“For my mother’s funeral, I was walking with my siblings and our families into our home church sanctuary where our father had been the Pastor previously.

In the short walk from the prayer room to the sanctuary for Mother’s celebration service, something hit me in my throat and chest --- pounding my body, bringing me to tears.


I was Exhibit A for the ‘body-blows of grief’!”

Give the gift of The Grief Letter

"I really enjoyed your illustrations ... it is written with sincere empathy ... I will give it to friends, encouraging them to read it a little at a time."


“Death is a friend---not something to dread and fear. In our sorrow there is One we can trust. We may trust the Holy One. Death comes under His jurisdiction.

I have given much thought to death because I have spent a lot of time with grieving families in funeral homes and cemeteries. I have gone there hundreds of times for graveside services and the burial of dear ones loved by family and respected in the community. Always, this is an act of faith---never an empty ritual.

In such moments, we discover ‘heaven-faith’ is for real, offering us strong comfort. I have personally experienced God’s comfort in my grief. I believe in the Most High God. I believe in heaven. And I believe we ‘adventure’ faith to a wholly different kind of existence beyond this earthly life.

’Heaven-faith’ teaches us to ‘wait’ upon the Lord. To wait upon the Lord is to do everything I can to manage my grief in the near term and to trust God for the long term.”  

“The Grief Letter” Chapter 33, page 279-280.

bottom of page